Searching.....

For as long as I can remember I've been looking for somewhere to belong. Whether it be at school with my friends or even at home with my family, I have always found myself searching for some place to fit in. I don't understand it, there have been very few places that I've felt like I belong...is something wrong with me?

I remember once about 2 years ago I was out with some friends. I had been feeling myself growing apart from them for a while and I didn't know how to handle it because these were my friends. I couldn't understand why was I feeling this way about them especially when they did nothing wrong. Anyway, as the day progressed I felt myself becoming physically and mentally drained just being around them. It came to the point that we were in one store and I just sat down in the middle of the floor, exhausted. I just folded my arms and said "I don't want to be here anymore." They told me that we would be leaving the store soon but I meant that I was didn't want to be around them anymore. I know it sounds really harsh but that's just how I felt. The simple fact was that we had outgrown each other and that was that.

Truth is, I've probably have been looking in the wrong places to try and find where I belong and I feel that God has been trying to reach out to me and tell me that I would fit perfectly with Him, which is great because I've always wanted to feel wanted but is it wrong that I want to find other's on this Earth that I can fit in with as well? Is it wrong to want both when God is supposed to be the only One we need?

It almost feels like I'm in preschool all over again, hoping that someone will come play with me in the sandbox but the older I get I find it more and more difficult to find good people that you want to keep in your life.

I'm hoping that throughout this journey I can find not only what God has intended for me but also some solid people that I can share this journey who I can also share a part of my life with.

One thing that I do know, no matter how much I search I'll never find anyone better than God because I've:

"searched all over... couldn't find nobody
I looked high and low... still couldn't find nobody
Nobody greater... nobody greater no... nobody greater than you."

Be blessed everyone :)